Deleted Scenes
by song six
Summary: ...and other crack nonsense
1. Chapter 1

So…it's 2am where I am and I can't sleep. I also have no motivation or energy to think at this time so I'm not working on any stories. But because I have nothing to do and a lame sense of humor I typed up deleted scenes and alternate endings and thought I'd share them. In Manga/Anime fandom they're called 'Omakes'. This is a fair warning for you to click the 'X' in the top corner right now or to go read an actual story than waste your time. Otherwise…um…enjoy.

**x.X.x.X.x**

Oblivious:

"Nope, I've been kind of oblivious."

"Oh, ok. Brownie?"

"Yeah, sure."

_Half an hour later_

Robin had finally finished his project. He was just on his way to the zeta beams when he stopped dead in his tracks in front of an unbelievable sight before him. His team…they were in the living room…and they were…they were…

…Just laying there.

"Hey guys, something up?" He asked them, finding it a bit unusual to find Wally and Artemis sprawled on the couch staring at their hands.

"Duuude, wanna know what's up? Your normal force."

"What?" He cocked his head at the speedster not understanding.

"Your normal force duuuude."

"_What?"_

"What's Wallace is trying to explain in the form of a terrible sense of humor is that your normal force will always be perpendicular to the surface. You are standing on a flat surface; therefore, in not so technical terms 'what is up' is, indeed, your normal force. Actually, come to think of it the joke does have some hilarity."

"….what the heck Artemis?"

"I concur! Let us take our clothes off it is so **hot** in here! Teehee!"

"Are you giggling Kaldur? What is wrong with you–DUDE! Quit touching me!"

"But Robin, your skin is quite soft!"

"He's right, it is."

"Whatdoyouthinkyou'redoingSuperboy?" Robin sputtered out as the oldest of their team nuzzled their faces into his cape. "That's not my skin!"

"Yeeeeah you twooo…get your filthy paaaws off of him." Wally defended, before getting distracted by the brightness of the florescent lights above.

"Hey beach babe…I mean…uh…bay watch…no…I think I meant beach babe, yeah. Beach babe. Isn't it weeeeird how paws is like pause but isn't?"

"Artemis, I totally know what you mean."

"Righteous."

"Robin!"

"Miss Martian! What's going on here?" Robin cried out as the alien rescued him from the other boys.

"I don't know! And who ate all the brownies? I didn't even have one…"

"Brownies?"

"Yes! I baked brownies this time."

"…where'd you get the recipe?"

"Roy. Why?"

"...I'm going home."

"Robin? Robin? Why? What's wrong with the recipe? Robin?"

**x.X.x.X.x**

How Do you Know?:

"What should you do then, if someone has a crush on you?"

"Tell them you feel the same way and that you know how they feel."

"Alright if you say so. But I don't really feel the same for Wally."

"Not yet, anyways."

_Ten years down the road_

"I now pronounce you man and wife, you may now kiss the bride!"

"Oh darling, you've made this the happiest day of my life!"

"Me too sweetie cheekie poo!" The groom than turned to his best man and whispered in his ear, "thankyou Kaldur. You were right."

**x.X.x.X.x**

Red Hair:

Suddenly he couldn't speak anymore, because something or more of **someone** was covering his lips with their own. Robin was kissing him.

Kid flash froze. His mind was swirling and he both excited, happy, whelmed, whatever…damn he was just happy! But confused too…

Pulling away he asked, "What about Batgirl?"

"Threesome. Duh!"

"Scoreboard!"

And then they high-fived and lived happily ever after.

**x.X.x.X.x**

Agent Wallace West: Code Blue

"Can I kiss you?"

"Hell yeah, pucker up!"

"Alright Ba–OW! Dude that's my jaw!"

"And that's a knuckle sandwich, want another?"

"Sure, if you're into that sort of thing."

"OUT!"

**x.X.x.X.x**

Make Your Papa Proud:

"…Fine. But you better find a bag of bugles and some captain crunch for me," Dick smiled at Wally, and the red head smiled back before they bro fist pounded. The speedster than ran off, at normal speed in public mind you, and the dark haired boy waited patiently for his return.

Dick tapped his fingers at his sides to the beat of the pop music they played on the loud speaker. It was 'How Do You Sleep', but he had no shame in liking Jesse McCartney. The guy had a great voice and good music.

But as he got lost in the melody he suddenly felt _really_ uncomfortable. He turned his body to make it appear as if he were looking at the flower arrangements and used his peripheral vision to see who was the person creeping up in his space.

There were five of them, all clad in matching spandex suits. Each of them had their own individual colors: Red, Yellow, Blue, Pink, and White. You couldn't see their eyes due to their cowl and the black visors they had.

"Excuse me, but do you think you guys could back up a little?" Dick asked them. But then they got into battle stances clearly insulted.

"We're the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers! Hell no we ain't moving." The red one told him.

"Um…why not?"

The Pink one giggled before responding, "we like your ass." Slapping it for emphasis.

"You and everyone else on the goddamn planet!" And with that Dick threw his arms up in the air and stomped out of the store.

**x.X.x.X.x**

Bride with a Paper Ring

"NO! You don't get it!" she was shocked, and his body shook. She was not expecting that at all. He held her tighter and a small whimper almost escaped from his lips, but he caught it, "it's not fair to you…" he whispered gently

"It wouldn't be fair to you if I kept staying with you…"

"Still feeling something for her?" she knew that wasn't quite it, but she wanted more.

"No…it's a him."

"….WHAT? Who?"

"God, I knew you would react this way."

"Dammit Roy, tell me right now!"

"He doesn't want people knowing yet."

"Is it Wally?"

"No! He's too fast in bed!"

"…I'm not even going to grace that with a response. Superboy?"

"He's with Megan!"

"Robin?"

"Do you take me for a child molester Artemis?"

"Aqualad?"

"The guy is still hung up over something about his closest best friend in the whole wide world stealing the only woman he ever loved…or something boring like that."

"…oh my god…I know who it is."

"Don't say it."

"Roy, you freak."

"Please don't say it."

"You're screwing Megatron aren't you?"

"Damn Artemis, do you have to say it out loud?"

**x.X.x.X.x**

Bumblebee Take Flight:

"I'm…" he looked right into Wally's green eyes with inquiring blue ones, "…whelmed."

Kid Flash grimace like the other boy just punched him in the stomach; as if he just told him the most devastating news he's ever heard; as if his whole world was taken from him. Superboy recognized this expression before. He's seen it time and time again whenever they failed to save the loved one of a civilian they were assisting. He hated seeing that look, because there was nothing he could do. Aqualad tried to teach him that was going to happen, but he still hated it.

"You miss him a lot, don't you?" it was a blunt statement, and it wasn't a question either.

Kid Flash immediately scowled biting out defensively, "What are you talking about?"

Superboy sighed, dipping his head down before continuing, "Wally, man, I hear you in the bathroom."

The speedster's eyes widened in shock, he almost dropped the jar. "For real? Am I that loud?"

"I hear you call his name and junk man. This isn't healthy." There was empathy in his voice, Wally knew he was trying to be there for him, but no one would understand how hard the situation truly was.

"I know, I know! But what else can I do? I'm so pathetic!" Wally cried out as his eyes teared up and snot dribbled out of his nose. He buried his head into Conner's lap as everything simply ached.

Superboy felt bad for his poor friend, but suddenly he got an epiphany, "no…I have an idea." The clone took his hand and they started running into the distance following the setting sun out into the horizon.

Hours later, the team found them at Chip&Dale's solving Wally's problem. The End.

**x.X.x.X.x**

Check Yes, Juliet:

The speedster gave a meek smile before admitting, "And I kind of sort of got some help from Diana…I mean, you know…Wonder Woman."

"Wonder woman?" Dick laughed

Wally nodded with a lot of amusement, "She's got him a short leash if you know what I mean."

"Ha! Called it! Both me and Alf always knew even if Bruce denied it." The teen hooted pumping his fist in the air. He was definitely going to call the butler tonight and tell him about the juicy piece of information. They were so not going to let Bruce down for this, ever.

Wally placed a finger on his chin in thought as he continued, "They haven't actually done anything, but I'm pretty sure they want to."

"Why don't they?"

"I heard a rumor that Superman called dibs."

(Break)

"You…like me." Dick said each word slowly and carefully. As if he said them too fast, everything would spiral into uncontrollable confusion. As if everything wasn't confusing enough…

"Y-Yeah…" Wally stumbled in his response with a choke and both of their faces heated up.

Robin bit his lip feeling flustered. "In the same way you like Miss Martian or Artemis?" his voice cracked a few pitches, puberty making its first appearance. Wally had to resist from chuckling at him for it, he's been wanting this for so long and didn't want to ruin the moment.

"One, I don't like Artemis for the last time…" Wally frowned at him, before smiling again with half lidded eyes "…two, no. I like you _so much more_ than that Rob." Suddenly, they were both _very _aware of each other's fingers.

Robin giggled, his sparkling blue eyes shining, as he pursed adorable pink lips, "Ok, I like you too."

"Really?"

"Yeah really. I've always secretly liked you. I just never had the guts to tell you because I was afraid it'd ruin our friendship." Robin confessed, blushing cutely.

Wally grinned, happy at this lucky turn of events, running fingers through fiery red hair, "thank god. What kind of mess would I be in had you not felt the same?"

"Yeah, that would have been a bitch."

**x.X.x.X.x**

If I Just lay here:

There was a bobbing in his eyes, and a sting in his nostrils as they flared intensely, "please…" two fists clenched into soft blankets in frustration as a ringing entered his head, and an awful ache entered his heart, "…I never even got to say goodbye…" a whimper escaped his throat, and his chest constricted in pain. When it was clear he was waiting for nothing, he curled up into a huddle, hugging his knees, shamelessly sobbing.

"You said you'd be here…"

"Dude! I'm so sorry I'm late! I got a flat on my motorcycle and–were you crying?"

"NO!"

"Damn Wally, you're such a baby!"

**x.X.x.X.x**

Too Good to be True:

Right before he was about to hit the boy, Wally realized what was happening, eyes going wide as he slammed his foot on the brakes. But it was too late, the car was going too fast! Conner was just about to yell at Grayson to get out of the way when the boy simply stands in the middle of the road. The expression on his face clearly read he knew the car was coming. Did he want to be road kill or something? Was it because of what he said?

"Grayson!" but just as the head of the car was going to hit the boy it was all over. His body flew ten feet into the air, and splattered all over the ground. Conner ended up having to get a new tutor, and he ended up passing calculus and kept his scholarship with no problems. Wally on the other hand went to jail for reckless driving and murder.

The End.

**x.X.x.X.x**


	2. Chapter 2

**Don't worry. I'm working on my stories. But I couldn't help myself.**

Wonderstruck:

"Hey, look at the stars. They look–"  
>"Sparkling."<p>

"Sparkling?" Wally turned his head and saw Dick laying beside him enjoying the view as well. He raised an eyebrow in question of his word choice.

"They are!" He insisted. Wally continued to give him a weird look, until Dick playfully punched him in the shoulder and he started punching back. When they ceased their tomfoolery, they stopped and simply gazed: green to blue. It was strange, for the smallest millisecond it felt different from anything he's felt before. It was an unexplainable feeling. What could this be? At the time, it was incredibly awkward. They both turned away back to the sky bashfully. They laid there admiring the sky for a good while. Once again, it was Dick who broke the silence the second time that day.

"Most nights, I actually like to lay down watching the night sky with my mom." He whispered, his voice slightly raspy as he coughed into one hand. It felt like an intimate piece of information he was telling him, and Wally felt more than grateful this boy he just met was willing to tell him something like that.

"Really?"

"On the road, what else can you do? Besides, it never ceases to amaze me. Y'know? How deep it looks, as if you can reach out and fall into an ocean of endless darkness and stars. How could anyone ever get tired of it?"

Wally was taken aback, wonderstruck by this boy, "wow, Dick that was really deep. How'd you come up with that?" He asked with great awe lacing his words.

Dick looked back at him with glittering blue eyes before grinning widely and exclaiming, "my true love from an alternate universe told me!"

"…..what the hell–"

"Yeah! I'm blind, you're an asshole, and my true love there is waaaaay hotter, more muscular, and more sensitive than you!"

Too Good to be True:

**.*.*. Four Years Later in an Alternate Universe.*.*.**

"It's not just dark, it's pitch black out with a hint of blue, like looking into the ocean. You want to reach out your arms and touch the bottom…" as he says this he reaches his arms out, and so does Richard "…but you feel so small because it goes on endlessly…"

"Oh, Conner!"

**x.X.x.X.x**

Atlas Shrugged…and Slipped on a Banana Peel:

"The same had happened to Superboy. So now he has occupied the only couch." He explained, as Roy picked at his arm sheepishly.

"Alriiiight, I guuuess. But we have to set some ground rules." Roy told him with a stern expression wagging his finger in his face. Kaldur didn't even blink an eyelash.

"I am grateful and willing to follow and respect any rules you have for your home."

Roy nodded affirmatively before continuing. "Kay, rule number one. You stay in my room. In fact, we're sleeping in the same bed. One blanket."

"Understandable."

"Rule number two. You're going to be showering with me twice a day. Do not. I swear to god. Scrub your own butt, I'll do that _for you_."

"Um…alright?"

"Last rule. If you try to leave my cavern of ultimate sexy kinky time of gushy goo-goo love time I will kill you. And your underwater friends. I'm watching you," as Roy said this he pointed two fingers at his eyes and pointed them back to Aqualad in the most threatening way he could.

"That is a strange–"

"Follow them. Or leave."

"I will follow them." Roy moved out of the way for him to enter, but as Kaldur walked past the other boy grabbed his ass with a firm squeeze.

Suddenly, this visit was a thousand times more awkward than the last visit, and **everyone** was even naked this time.

**x.X.x.X.x**

More than a Penny's Worth:

He watched tears fall down rosy cheeks on the mirrored boy's face before turning around looking up at the other person in the room. "I'm all alone now, Mister Pennysworth." He whimpered, sniffling as the mirrored boy continued to cry.

Alfred scratched his chin as he tried to think up a solution. Finally, the most obvious idea in the world came to him…

"Golly gee Alfred! I'm so glad you convinced Bruce to adopt all these other kids! Now I'll never be alone!"

"Of course Master Richard. He will also never have to worry about another Robin dying again."

"What about Jason?"

"Jesus Grayson, who gives a rat's flying ass about that fucking reject bread hoarding failure?"

"Watch your mouth Damian, he's your brother too."

"I don't know Dick. I agree with the little demon. Jason was kind of an ass…"

"Come on Tim, just because he tried to kill you–"

"Repeatedly."

"–repeatedly…doesn't make him a 'reject bread hoarding failure'."

"Grayson. What part of 'failure' do you not comprehend? He failed to do off with Drake here, obviously he is useless."

"Fuck you guys! I'm awesome!"

"Jason!" the three other Robins chorused

"That's right. I'm alive, and I'm the freaking red hood."

"Odd, didn't know Aladdin wore a red hood."

"Screw you Drake! I'm doing your girlfriend!"

"You're with Superboy?"

"Uh…who's got the boner for strange annoying alien red heads again?"

"YOU DID IT WITH ROY?"

"Oh, I meant Starfire. But yeah Grayson, I totally did it with him too! Scoreboard!"

**x.X.x.X.x**

Get here with Root Beer:

"Well, it was nice to have met you Wally."

"You too…"

…bright blue eyes glanced back for _just a second_…

…and that was all he needed.

Suddenly, a surge of energy and confidence entered his gut. Before he knew it, he was hopping over the counter and dashing after him, "Hey! Wait!"

"Yeah?"

"Do you know anyone I could take to prom?"

"I know someone…"

**The Day of Prom**

"Wally, I'm having such a great time." His date murmured into his chest, as their face blushed a deep red while they danced the spotlight dance.

"I'm really glad Dick introduced us." Wally grinned, so happy to have found his true love.

"Are you sure you don't have a problem with who I am?" His date asked, eyes filled with worry.

"Of course not Megatron. You're the apple of my eye!"

"MEGATRON! HOW COULD YOU?"

"Roy! I didn't mean for you to find out this way!"

**x.X.x.X.x**

Check Yes, Juliet:

"You're still my best friend Dick."

"And you're mine Wally, no one could ever take your place."

"But here's the thing, I don't want you as my best friend anymore." This sent a pang of pain up and down Dick's body, but he felt he deserved it.

He looked down in shame with a dejected face, "I know…I wouldn't want **me** for a friend either."

"Pfft! Like right? That's why I found an ever _cooler_ best friend!"

"Who?" A web shot out of nowhere tying him up causing him to fall flat on his face to the ground.

"Your friendly neighborhood Spider-Man that's who!"


End file.
